Bismillahir Rahmani Raheem,
Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh,
I am only writing this out of concern for you as my Muslim Sister, and I love you for the sake of Allah Subhana wa ta'ala.I have been concerned about you for a while now, but I did not know how to put it into words, I also did not want to speak to you about it for fear it would cause an argument and we both say things that we would regret.
After this I will not bring this up again, nor will I ask you for your reasons for doing what you are doing, I will just make Dua to Allah(SWT) for Him to change your heart as HE alone is The Doer. This new decision of yours to withdraw from the dawah class is very worrying for me, especially since you were so enthusiastic about it and the dawah cause.
The withdrawal from the other gathering, I expected it, but I had hoped that you would attend because we are learning of the correct dawah and we need to spread it to our fellow Sisters in Islam. You obviously have very strong opinions *(and many disappointing experiences) about various Muslim individuals, and are very harsh in your judgment of them at times, nobody is Perfect, nobody is the Perfect Muslim, and if you are looking to find one, you are delusional and need to get back to reality.
Hiding is not the answer.
We as Muslims especially in a non-Muslim country (where we are considered weird or worse) need to put aside our differences and bond together, if someone wrongs you, beg Allah(SWT) to forgive them, Allah (SWT) forgives us when we beg HIM, so who are we to hold animosity towards those who have wronged us. I myself find this hard at times but Alhamdullilah I have learned ,and am still learning to overcome it.
We have to look towards Jannah, We need correct knowledge, we need correct Aqidah, and Alhamdullilah I believe I am gaining that knowledge from the dawah course, and I believe that knowledge needs to be propogated to the rest of the Muslim community. I am not going to quote any daleel here, because you I am sure, are more familiar with the various verses and hadith to corroborate what I am saying.
We cannot neglect our responsibility to our brothers and sisters (in our case sisters) and we, and I include myself in ALL of this, we cannot seclude ourselves at every sign of perceived wrongdoing or animosity or incorrect aqidah etc. especially when we know the RIGHT thing. Once we are doing what ALLAH (SWT) loves, HE will love us. I know you will find all sorts of reasons (real or imagined) why you should not follow my advice, you never usually follow advice, at least not mine. I do not expect any thing different this time either.
My advice however is to relax, stop thinking that everyone and everything is so wrong that you do not want to be around them for fear of corruption of your morals, and corruption of your Islam. If something wrong is done, speak against it and move on. Abandonment is not the answer, they will just continue doing whatever wrong that you perceive.
You said once that someone told you that 'you think you are perfect', to be honest sometimes you give that impression in your mannerisms and how you react. Look at the BIG picture, not the tiny sketches that we encounter from day to day, once again I re-iterate that there are NO Perfect Muslims, we can only try our best to do deeds that are loved by ALLAH(SWT) and no more, and help others along the way to do the same, without making them feel lesser of a Muslim.
All this criticism I apply to myself also, many times I have felt like just secluding myself, just running away, even from you my dear sister, but that is what the Shaytaan wants me to do , so I will NOT give him the ACCURSED one the satisfaction of that.
InshaAllah I hope I have not offended you in this letter, and I hope you still love me for the sake of ALLAH(SWT), you are one of the very FEW people that I genuinely consider a friend and I only want the best for you. May ALLAH(SWT) grant us peace of mind, and May HE grant us Jannah. AMEEN, AMEEN, AMEEN YA RABBIL ALAMEEN.
Love always,
